So……there was this one Sunday morning!! It started out like any other…..Jeanna went to work rather early and my lazy ass laid in bed (this implies it is after hockey season) and slept until roughly 10am!! At which point I very unenthusiastically woke up, rubbed the crap out of my eyes and attempted to sit up and face the day!! Please bear in mind; in case you don’t know me well, I HATE MORNINGS!!!!!! Irrespective of what time they start!!
So I slowly but surely move around the bedroom and make my way out to the bathroom at which point I hear Tanner and Logan (Logan AKA Chewbacca) start their morning noise making as they too wake up and prepare to be fed. If you were to witness this you’d swear they hadn’t been fed in months!! So I get done in the bathroom and head over to let them out of their kennels and give them each their quarter cup of “yummy deliciousness” otherwise known as Eukanuba small breed weight control dog food!!
Well as I look around for their bowls, which ‘someone’ in the house likes to play hide and go seek with, I notice their food container is EMPTY….. well WTH!?!? I remember Jeanna saying the day before that they needed food, and I said well then we must stop when we’re out at the store to get some………well now it appears that did not happen and I’m fresh out of food for them!! What shall I do?? They’re all kinds of worked up and want their food now!!!!
No problem I think, I’ll give them a treat they can have soft food as there are tins of it upstairs. So off I go, scurrying up the stairs, ready to be the hero and save the day! Get upstairs and guess what? The soft food is nowhere to be found…now I’m starting to get annoyed, what the hell am I going to do. I am about to have two 9 pound dogs going into doggy revolt if I don’t feed them FIVE MINUTES AGO!!!!!! I dig in their treat box and what do I find? A sample size bag of Science Diet dog food and I have no option but to feed it to them and hope and pray that they don’t get upset stomachs (my puppies are very sensitive to changes in their diets). I run with them back down stairs, trying at all costs to avoid tripping over one of them as they keep turning back to ensure I’m not changing my mind or going back upstairs. I feed them, they gobble it down and crisis is averted thank goodness!!
ONLY, at this point do I pick up my cell phone to text message Jeanna and ask her why we didn’t stop to get them food if they really were out (of course this can’t be my fault right?!). Well……..turns out jokes on me!!! They have a half full 20 pound bag of dog food in the laundry room. Jeanna very quickly points this out and laughs at me (over text message) stating that she had said they were out of food because their smaller container we put it in to feed them from was empty!!
I kick my own ass for been a dumb ass and move on with my day…..its CEREAL time!!!
Well in case you didn’t hear read my blog prior to this one, let me quote a bit of it here;
When I eat cereal I need a BOWL……a deep bowl to get all my yummy rice krispies or corn flakes in the bowl with my milk and sugar and then there is indeed a need to not spill as its milk and no one wants milk on their couch, carpets etc. Any sudden movements made with a bowl that is not deep enough could cause such an unwanted outcome.
Bearing this in mind I made my way upstairs, again, to prepare myself a feast of fantastic Kellogg’s rice krispies. I open the cabinet to get my blue cereal bowl which, I might add, has the perfect depth for ideal cereal consumption. What?? I can’t find any of the 3 blue bowls in the cabinet….where could they be? In the sink……..oh no, they’re dirty!!! Now what will I do? The normal human being would, of course, wash the bowl in order to use it………right? Well no, not me!! I whine to myself that none of the bowls I want to use are clean then I sort the dirty dishes in the sink after which I reluctantly take a white SHALLOW bowl out of the cabinet and make myself cereal. A bowl of cereal that is not nearly as large as it could have been had my blue bowl been clean but nevertheless I came back downstairs and ate my cereal.
What cracks me up the most about this entire episode is the fact that I never considered just washing the blue bowl in order to be able to use it and the fact that I had this entire conversation with myself as no one else was at home!!!
The last note to my sorry tale is the fact that the dog’s wet food was in actual fact upstairs. Since I’ve returned from Iceland I have been asking for bottles of water, a lot of it because I’ve been so sick and between coughing up a lung and having an extremely sore throat I’ve needed a lot of water. I couldn’t find the package of bottles in the garage or in their ‘usual’ spot in the kitchen…..yet somehow Jeanna has been able to constantly produce these bottles of water when I was unable to locate them so after a while I gave up looking for these ‘hidden’ bottles of water. When Jeanna got home and we had the discussion about my ‘interesting’ morning she said but the dog food is in the PANTRY and then she walked upstairs to do something. I said WHAT? Pantry? I ran after her…..I bought this house 6 years ago and I’m pretty sure at that point I didn’t have a pantry and I don’t recall ever ‘getting one.’ To which she said to me “open the closet doors”……… I did!! WOW!!!!!!!! See the before and after pictures below: (and YES I am extremely unobservant, like very, very unobservant!!)
